StreamCupboard Repairs Kills Streamer (nearly)
So my replacement chair finally arrived and survived the ficticious angry, office furniture hating courier. The box was a litle banged up and didn't seem taped shut too well, so I fully expected "Important Bits" to have fallen out, leading to a self-assembly rage-quit. But no... everything was there. So far, so good.
The instructions were, as is the norm these days, a series of pictures which, on this occasion, failed to be confusing as there were very few parts to put together. The smell of fake leather and packaging were their usual heady mix and I was quite impressed at how solid it seemed. Under £100 and I seem to have a beauty of a chair- result!
Ah, but I was reminded what bracket we had bought in soon enough.
It started well - I remembered to screw the lever plate to the underside of the seat using opposite corners a bit at a time until all were tightened- no slopey seat for me! Years of experience have taught me that you don't fully tighten screws etc until you are happy everything is in place and I applied this methodology to attaching the arms. I was a little forewarned from some of the reviews that this is a bit of a pain as the arms attach to the back and seat (meaning you can't remove them but my desk is quite high so that was not a problem for me) and attaching to both was a bit fiddly. After 15 minutes on the first arm, sweating like a truck full of pigs on the way to the sausage factory, the calm approach was being replaced by many colourful words. The second arm wasn't much better and was helped by the fact the screws did not seem to fully tighten, even when I wanted them to and it felt like the holes were threaded. Assembly swearily completed, I gazed at my creation and tested the arms. They felt wobbly. I swore again.
At this point, it is easy to see why some people have taken to product descriptions of this chair and ranted, becoming yet another potential psychotic courier, kicking office furniture out of their van somewhere in the wilderness. Leaving them to rust whilst driving away cackling manically and forging a "signed for" signature. But I stubbornly refused to believe the universe had shat on me, on this occasion. I started to use it and was mildly surprised to feel that the wobble has gone from the arms. The lumber support was doing its job (though you cannot remove it, but that might be just as well) and all seemed comfortable and good. I realised that the chair was probably designed that way but the instructions, in their obsession to be as cheap to produce as possible, had failed to mention it because the makers didn't want to go to the hassle of printing things in a billion different languages. Likewise, the little knowledge I had gathered from previous builds on when not to fully tighten screws was missing - the race to cut costs is stopping this vital knowledge being passed on.
Perhaps I am being overly generous and these are actually design flaws that my fat ass has freakisly cured. Or it is about to collapse under me hilariously. Either way I am lucky at internet-bought-chair-roulette or an accident waiting to happen. If it is the latter, let it be when I am streaming- will do wonders for the viewer figures and my kids can (proudly?) declare theit father is a meme.